How To Seize Your Golden Opportunity: Making Ethical Decisions And Living An Ethical Life

The right thing may not always be easy— but it is always right.

I think just about everybody is looking for a golden opportunity. Businesspeople in particular possess a keen eye for such things. How do you find a true golden opportunity among all the offers that are really there? You don’t look outside yourself. Most people think their greatest opportunities come from a job, an investment, or a market niche. But the truth is that the greatest opportunity you have is to change who you are. It’s like offering a position on the Olympics team to someone who hasn’t trained for their event. The good news is that he has been granted a shot at winning. The bad news is that he’s not ready for it.

ONE THING LEADS TO ANOTHER

You can’t capitalize on an opportunity you receive on the outside until you’ve done the groundwork on the inside.

I suspect that was the problem for some of the leaders who ruined their careers and destroyed their organizations in recent years. They hadn’t done the ethical groundwork on the inside before attaining power. Their weak character prompted them to make bad decisions, and with each poor choice, they got into deeper trouble. Character problems tend to snowball. C. S. Lewis gave insight into the process using a military metaphor. He explained,

Good and evil both increase at compound interest. That is why the little decisions you and I make every day are of such infinite importance. The smallest good act today is the capture of a strategic point from which, a few months later, you may be able to go on to victories you never dreamed of. An apparently trivial indulgence in lust or in anger today is the loss of a ridge or railway line or bridgehead from which the enemy may launch an attack otherwise impossible.

If you want to be able to pursue golden opportunities, then pursue the development of strong character first. That will position you well to face any ethical challenges that may lie ahead and to make the most of your chances when your time comes. Here’s how I suggest you proceed:

1. Take Responsibility for Your Actions

U.S. President Woodrow Wilson observed, “Responsibility is proportionate to opportunity.” Why is that? Because a person of responsibility can trust himself to choose the right thing over the easy thing. He takes to heart the words of historian Will Durant, who said, “Never mind your happiness; do your duty.”

I once heard someone say that frustration is “having no one to blame but yourself.” But rarely do people who play the blame game get many golden opportunities. And even the few opportunities they do get slip through their fingers. When that happens, you hear why it’s not their fault. Their excuses fall into three categories:

• The Hang-ups—who blame life’s circumstances,
• The Bang-ups—who blame past personal problems and hurts, and
• The Gang-ups—who blame other people for hindering them.

If you desire to be trusted by others and you want to achieve much, you must take responsibility for your actions. Winston Churchill was right when he called responsibility “the price of greatness.” It’s also the groundwork for opportunity.

2. Develop Personal Discipline

I recently saw the results of a survey that said 82 percent of corporate executives admit to cheating at golf, and 72 percent believe actions in business and golf parallel each other. Why is it that even when people see a parallel between games and life, they still choose to cut corners? I believe the answer is that they lack discipline. People who fail to develop personal discipline are often tempted to cheat to keep up. In the words of H. Jackson Brown, “Talent without discipline is like an octopus on roller skates. There’s plenty of movement, but you never know if it’s going to be forward, backwards, or sideways.”

Nineteenth-century clergyman and Oxford University professor H. P. Liddon said, “What we do on some great occasion will probably depend on what we already are; and what we are will be the result of previous years of self-discipline.” People who desire to improve their character and their chances of success must discipline themselves when it comes to:

• Time: Since you can’t control how much time you have, you must control how you use it.
• Energy: You should always strive to use your energy on your strengths.
• Goals: You can’t do everything, so you must discipline yourself to do the important things.
• Moods: If you do not master your emotions, they will master you.

Successful people who work well with others and who relish challenges as well as opportunities don’t see discipline as negative or restrictive. They welcome it. Vince Lombardi, the legendary American Football coach of the NFL Green Bay Packers, asserted, “I’ve never known a man worth his salt who in the long run, deep down in his heart, didn’t appreciate the grind, the discipline.”

3. Know Your Weaknesses

One evening at U.S. President Theodore Roosevelt’s home in New York, naturalist William Beebe walked outside with his host. Roosevelt searched the star-filled night sky and, finding a small glow below the corner of the constellation Pegasus, he said, “This is the spiral galaxy Andromeda. It is as large as our Milky Way. It consists of one hundred billion suns. It is one of a hundred billion galaxies.” Then Roosevelt looked at Beebe and said, “Now, I think we are small enough! Let’s go to bed.”

Theodore Roosevelt was very good at keeping things in perspective. Part of that came from knowing himself and his weaknesses. Roosevelt was weak, sickly, asthmatic, and underweight as a child. Recognizing this, he dedicated himself to strengthening his body. He went on to work as a cowboy, hunt wild game, fight in battles as a cavalry officer, and box. He changed from being a puny boy to being the most vigorous U.S. president.

To be forewarned is to be forearmed. People who know their weakness are rarely taken by surprise, nor do they allow others to exploit their areas of weakness. In contrast, people who deceive themselves or who pretend to be strong where they’re not set themselves up for failure.

4. Align Your Priorities with Your Values

Integrity can be described as making your beliefs and your actions line up. When individuals say they believe one thing and then deliberately do something else, it’s obvious that they lack integrity. But how about someone who doesn’t realize that his actions contradict his beliefs? Even though it’s not deliberate, that person still has an integrity problem.

The most basic definition of integrity includes the idea that something or someone is whole and complete. If you’re asserting one thing but doing another, you’re divided. And as President Abraham Lincoln asserted, a house divided against itself cannot stand. The solution is simple, though not necessarily easy. Define your values; then align your priorities.

5. Admit Wrongdoing Quickly and Ask Forgiveness

One thing that has characterized many high-profile business breakdowns has been some kind of cover-up. Many executives in some large companies have tried to hide any wrongdoing. Of course, that attitude isn’t pervasive just in business. People of poor character in every profession are quicker to cover up than they are to confess wrongdoing. What they don’t know is that people are more forgiving and trusting when individuals who make mistakes are truthful about them and ask for forgiveness.

6. Take Extra Care with Finances

If you want to know something about the character of individuals, watch how they handle money. (Automaker Henry Ford remarked, “Money doesn’t change men, it merely unmasks them. If a man is naturally selfish or arrogant or greedy, the money brings that out, that is all.”) Are people generous with others’ money but tight with their own? Do they insist that every transaction clearly benefit them? Do they cut corners to gain more wealth? What place does money have in their lives?

People are often tripped up when they make accumulating wealth a higher priority than it should be. That was the mythical king Midas’s problem. He put money first in his life, and it almost cost him everything. Stoic philosopher Zeno of Citium said, “The avaricious man is like the barren sandy ground in the desert which sucks in all the rain and dew with greediness, but yields no fruitful herbs or plants for the benefit of others.”

Money is nothing more than a tool. But it is a sharp tool, one that if handled poorly can do great harm. That’s why we should always take extra care with finances. If we can maintain the right attitude about money, then it will always be a positive, helpful tool, not a destructive one. As P. T. Barnum observed, “Money is a terrible master but an excellent servant.” To keep money from becoming a master, I recommend doing the following:

• Earn Your Money: People who earn what they have possess a greater respect for the possessions of others. And they often try to get more value for their money if they have to earn it themselves.
• Be Scrupulously Honest: Bend over backward to make sure all your financial dealings are above board, not only for the sake of others, but also for yourself. B. C. Forbes observed, “He is a wise man who seeks by every legitimate means to make all the money he can honestly, for money can do so many worthwhile things in this world, not merely for one’s self but for others. But he is an unmitigated fool who imagines for a moment that it is more important to make the money than to make it honestly.”
• Be Generous: It’s been said that we make a living by what we get; we make a life by what we give. Giving not only helps others and frees us, it also puts money into perspective better than anything else we can do.
• Use Credit Wisely and Sparingly: King Solomon advised, “The rich rules over the poor, and the borrower becomes the lender’s slave.” To maintain your freedom, refrain from incurring debt.

The American president, Calvin Coolidge said, “There is no dignity quite so impressive and no independence quite so important as living within your means.” Learning to have the right attitude toward money and to handle it well (instead of being handled by it) paves the way for many other character victories in a person’s life.

7. Put Your Family Ahead of Your Work

The list of titles and positions he earned is impressive: U.S. congressman, ambassador to the United Nations, chief liaison officer in China, head of the CIA, vice president of the United States, and, finally, president of the United States. But when his life in public office ended, the elder George Bush said that he still possessed the three most important titles he had ever held: husband, father, and grandfather. That’s a great perspective on family.

Unfortunately, many people in our culture seem willing to set their families aside because they think they must in order to get ahead in their careers. But in the long run, making your family a priority doesn’t hurt your career; it actually helps it. As NBA coach Pat Riley said, “Sustain a family for a long period of time and you can sustain success for a long period of time. First things first. If your life is in order, you can do whatever you want.” Having a strong and stable family creates a launching pad for many other successes during a career and provides a contented landing place at the end of it.

8. Place High Value on People

When most people think of developing character, they focus on what they must become, which is good, since that is the majority of the process. But to make yourself ready to seize golden opportunities, you must do something more. You must value others enough to give them a part of yourself—your trust.

In Winning Management: Six Fail-Safe Strategies for Building High-Performance Organizations, Wolf J. Rinke writes, “If you mistrust your employees, you’ll be right 3 percent of the time. If you trust people until they give you a reason not to, you’ll be right 97 percent of the time.” Those are pretty good odds.

Mike Abrashoff is the author of It’s Your Ship: Management Techniques from the Best Damn Ship in the Navy. Mike is the epitome of someone who was ready for his golden opportunity when it came and who achieved success by practicing the Golden Rule (The principle of treating others as one would want to be treated by them)

Before Mike took his first command, which was of the USS Benfold, he had already been successful. He had graduated from the U.S. Naval Academy at Annapolis. He had excelled as an officer, attaining the rank of captain after sixteen years, and had worked as military assistant to Dr. William J. Perry when he was the U.S. Secretary of Defense. But when Mike took command of the Benfold, he saw it as a rare opportunity to do something different, to use a Golden Rule approach to leadership. Mike says,

The first sixteen years of my career, I went for the gold braid. I had success, but it wasn’t unusual success. The last two I went for the Golden Rule. I took command of the ship and took command of my life. Before, I was working according to what I thought were the organization’s expectations. But while working for Secretary of Defense Perry, I saw a departure from that kind of thinking. When I saw my predecessor leaving the ship, I thought about what my departure would be like.

The U.S. navy is like a tree full of monkeys. If you’re at the top of the tree, all you see when you look down is a bunch of smiling faces looking up to you. When you’re at the bottom of the tree and you look up, you have a different kind of view!

Mike decided to put himself in the shoes of his sailors. He individually interviewed every sailor on his ship to find out what they valued, and then he made changes to add value to them, such as sending the ship’s cooks to culinary school and offering college courses aboard ship. He asked his officers to treat the new arrivals as they would want their own children treated. And he empowered everyone—officer and enlisted person alike—to make decisions and work to make their ship the best in the navy, trusting them and encouraging them with the words: “It’s your ship.”

“Good began to happen when I began going for the Golden Rule,” says Mike. “I put people instead of promotion first. And as a result, I was paid a thousand times over.” That’s what I call making the most of a golden opportunity.